Originally posted to Tumblr: June 4th, 2013
I’ve come to absolutely adore the good ol' “Founding Fathers” argument. You know the one that goes sump-tin like: When the Founding Fathers wrote, let's say... the second amendment for example, they likely didn’t envision automatic riffles with hundred round clips and those plastic x-ray deceiving Glock 9’s being available at a discount for today only's un-lawfully lowest prices on aisle six of the local Super Duper Savers Big Box Super-Store that’s you know… super. Listen, it’s an argument with which I whole-heartedly n' totally agree, to some extent… but…
I’m equally sure that Tommy Douglas, the so-called Founding Father of Canada’s Universal Health Care System/Safety-Net, was probably thinking , that maybe farmer Bob shouldn’t loose the farm when he falls from the harvester rather than pondering the notion of a machine that goes “ping” and keeps all those Super-Sized Soda slurpin’ 700lb chain smokers alive through the age of 98.7…
I expect likewise that the “founding fathers” of Social Security or the CPP didn’t envision an age of retirement set to freedom 55 with grandpa driving a JetSki at the “you’re only ripe as you think you are’ olden-age of 92.1 or 93.9; NOR could they have guessed that grandma would be wandering the senior extend-a-care centre halls not knowing her name or mine as she celebrated her 115th birthday with the gang of registered nursing assistant’s assistants who earlier that day drove her to the polls and held her hand as she put that x beside the only pol whose name anyone could remember at the moment… and their cats.
I betcha the crafters of my dear old and almost gone sentimental-capitalism didn't bank on one single corporation owned by pirates owning both the genetic sequence of 75% of the world’s cash crop and the White House at exactly the same time, OR the good fellas who put our kids into the free ‘n open over-crowded classroom thinking that the teachers union would back their membership’s demand that ritalin become the backbone of the head-in-the-cumuli curriculum as the alternative disciplinary methodology when faced with a room full of six year old boys being… rambunctious.
Yup, those founding fathers were pretty near sighted; I doubt they had once, even for a moment expected that this constitution thingy of theirs would end up being interpreted by their whining, foot stomping, not-so-great, great, great, great, great, great great grand-spoiled-babies shouting “me-me-me, and I want I want exactly everything I want and I want it right now”. Those gran-chillin’ of theirs who learned about this last years elections from Jon-Stewart Colbert the third in those 5 second remote controlled accidents as they flipped the channel from Snookie upon the “Jersey Shore” to those 8 year old re-runs of the “West Wing” that are shown at 2am on channel 12,876’s Time-warp-TV… after the evenings episode of “Pray-on-TV”.
Nope, I betcha that those founding father could only have assumed they were writing ‘dat shit down to be used by adults.
...dumb ass Foundin’ Fathers… nuttin’ but a bunch of Dead Precedents.
I’m equally sure that Tommy Douglas, the so-called Founding Father of Canada’s Universal Health Care System/Safety-Net, was probably thinking , that maybe farmer Bob shouldn’t loose the farm when he falls from the harvester rather than pondering the notion of a machine that goes “ping” and keeps all those Super-Sized Soda slurpin’ 700lb chain smokers alive through the age of 98.7…
I expect likewise that the “founding fathers” of Social Security or the CPP didn’t envision an age of retirement set to freedom 55 with grandpa driving a JetSki at the “you’re only ripe as you think you are’ olden-age of 92.1 or 93.9; NOR could they have guessed that grandma would be wandering the senior extend-a-care centre halls not knowing her name or mine as she celebrated her 115th birthday with the gang of registered nursing assistant’s assistants who earlier that day drove her to the polls and held her hand as she put that x beside the only pol whose name anyone could remember at the moment… and their cats.
I betcha the crafters of my dear old and almost gone sentimental-capitalism didn't bank on one single corporation owned by pirates owning both the genetic sequence of 75% of the world’s cash crop and the White House at exactly the same time, OR the good fellas who put our kids into the free ‘n open over-crowded classroom thinking that the teachers union would back their membership’s demand that ritalin become the backbone of the head-in-the-cumuli curriculum as the alternative disciplinary methodology when faced with a room full of six year old boys being… rambunctious.
Yup, those founding fathers were pretty near sighted; I doubt they had once, even for a moment expected that this constitution thingy of theirs would end up being interpreted by their whining, foot stomping, not-so-great, great, great, great, great, great great grand-spoiled-babies shouting “me-me-me, and I want I want exactly everything I want and I want it right now”. Those gran-chillin’ of theirs who learned about this last years elections from Jon-Stewart Colbert the third in those 5 second remote controlled accidents as they flipped the channel from Snookie upon the “Jersey Shore” to those 8 year old re-runs of the “West Wing” that are shown at 2am on channel 12,876’s Time-warp-TV… after the evenings episode of “Pray-on-TV”.
Nope, I betcha that those founding father could only have assumed they were writing ‘dat shit down to be used by adults.
...dumb ass Foundin’ Fathers… nuttin’ but a bunch of Dead Precedents.